Post by Stripes on Mar 7, 2010 23:32:41 GMT
Right. So. Now that I am off neopets I need to waste time. So I trying this fan fiction thing. I am terrible taking characters I have not created an copying them. So fan fiction writing isn't something I was/am really into.
Anyway, this is suppose to be a creak fic, but the first chapter is boreing and not very funny but need to introduce the story.
This is the first half of the chapter one. It is my first try at fan fiction, it is terrible. The grammar, the dialog, everything. If you could read, edit and criticize and help me for the love of owls!
Please and Thank You.
Chapter one - Change
The Doctor sat quietly, with a blank expression on his face with one hand supporting his head as he leaned on his desk. Ever since Mrs. Grant left him for the amazon and that dirty longed hair man named Professor Jones, the Doctor had found himself sad and lonely. “She is happy, she has found true love, she is doing amazing things in the amazon” he kept telling himself.
“Missing Mrs.Grant, Doctor?”
The Doctor jumped from his seat, looking around to see where the voice was coming from. There stood Sgt. Benton with a smile, yet the Doctor could see his sympathy through his eyes.
“What makes you think that?” Asked the Doctor annoyingly.
“Oh, you know, the strong bond that formed between you and Jo. The jealousy you had towards Professor Jones, and how you left with such a sad face during Jo’s farewell party.”
Benton stood silently as the Doctor took in everything that he said.
“You’re right Benton. I do miss her. I miss her very much. But I know she is happy, I know this is best for her.” Three went silent for a few secounds, then, out of no where, started to nearly shout in anger, “Yet I can’t help but feel so miserable all the time! There is a reason why I regenerated from my first incarnation!”
As the Doctor took in some deep breaths Benton sat thoughtfully, trying to think of something to say, something to comfort the Doctor.
“When I am trying to forget something I try to keep myself busy. Something….”
“Don’t be silly Benton, I have enough work as it is here with UNIT” the Doctor interrupted..
“… something that won’t remind me of what I am trying to forget.” Benton finished.
“And what will help me forget Mrs. Jo Grant?” The doctor asked with curiosity.
“Nothing that involves, aliens, the government, capitalist, environmentalist and long haired professors” Benton said half jokily. “Why not try something new, something adventures, something that you can do alone without a companion. Like … like… sky diving!”
“Oh Benton, I have live for hundred of years, traveled the universe, and you are suggesting sky diving?”
“Well, it something I enjoy doing” Benton replied, hurt by the Doctor’s comment.
“DOCTOR!! DOCTOR!!! DOCTOR I NEED YOU IMMENTLY!” shouted a voice from outside of the Doctor’s office.
Brigadier stormed into the office with a bright red face and was very angry. “DOCTOR!” he shouted again.
“Claim down Brigadier, what is making you so upset?” replied the Doctor.
“My men and I were having our weekly target practice in the field when one of my men hit something.”
“Isn’t that the point?” replied Benton cheekily.
“We hit something we weren’t suppose to…” Brigadier continued becoming very annoyed with the lack of respect he was being given. “As we ran over to see what or who we hit, we found this!” Brigadier pointed to the doorway, which was occupied by three men. Two were UNIT soldiers holding another man in handcuffs. The man smiled which was surround by a bread with a big nose that sat right above the beard. His black hair combed to the back with a touch of gray on the side. He was wearing a black pants and a black sweater with black gloves, it could only be one person, no, only one timelord, The Master.
Ok, I did some editing. Much better if you ask me. Now on to part two before it gets edit again by me, then clocket then it will be posted on teaspoon *shudders*
Anyway, this is suppose to be a creak fic, but the first chapter is boreing and not very funny but need to introduce the story.
This is the first half of the chapter one. It is my first try at fan fiction, it is terrible. The grammar, the dialog, everything. If you could read, edit and criticize and help me for the love of owls!
Please and Thank You.
Chapter one - Change
The Doctor sat quietly, with a blank expression on his face with one hand supporting his head as he leaned on his desk. Ever since Mrs. Grant left him for the amazon and that dirty longed hair man named Professor Jones, the Doctor had found himself sad and lonely. “She is happy, she has found true love, she is doing amazing things in the amazon” he kept telling himself.
“Missing Mrs.Grant, Doctor?”
The Doctor jumped from his seat, looking around to see where the voice was coming from. There stood Sgt. Benton with a smile, yet the Doctor could see his sympathy through his eyes.
“What makes you think that?” Asked the Doctor annoyingly.
“Oh, you know, the strong bond that formed between you and Jo. The jealousy you had towards Professor Jones, and how you left with such a sad face during Jo’s farewell party.”
Benton stood silently as the Doctor took in everything that he said.
“You’re right Benton. I do miss her. I miss her very much. But I know she is happy, I know this is best for her.” Three went silent for a few secounds, then, out of no where, started to nearly shout in anger, “Yet I can’t help but feel so miserable all the time! There is a reason why I regenerated from my first incarnation!”
As the Doctor took in some deep breaths Benton sat thoughtfully, trying to think of something to say, something to comfort the Doctor.
“When I am trying to forget something I try to keep myself busy. Something….”
“Don’t be silly Benton, I have enough work as it is here with UNIT” the Doctor interrupted..
“… something that won’t remind me of what I am trying to forget.” Benton finished.
“And what will help me forget Mrs. Jo Grant?” The doctor asked with curiosity.
“Nothing that involves, aliens, the government, capitalist, environmentalist and long haired professors” Benton said half jokily. “Why not try something new, something adventures, something that you can do alone without a companion. Like … like… sky diving!”
“Oh Benton, I have live for hundred of years, traveled the universe, and you are suggesting sky diving?”
“Well, it something I enjoy doing” Benton replied, hurt by the Doctor’s comment.
“DOCTOR!! DOCTOR!!! DOCTOR I NEED YOU IMMENTLY!” shouted a voice from outside of the Doctor’s office.
Brigadier stormed into the office with a bright red face and was very angry. “DOCTOR!” he shouted again.
“Claim down Brigadier, what is making you so upset?” replied the Doctor.
“My men and I were having our weekly target practice in the field when one of my men hit something.”
“Isn’t that the point?” replied Benton cheekily.
“We hit something we weren’t suppose to…” Brigadier continued becoming very annoyed with the lack of respect he was being given. “As we ran over to see what or who we hit, we found this!” Brigadier pointed to the doorway, which was occupied by three men. Two were UNIT soldiers holding another man in handcuffs. The man smiled which was surround by a bread with a big nose that sat right above the beard. His black hair combed to the back with a touch of gray on the side. He was wearing a black pants and a black sweater with black gloves, it could only be one person, no, only one timelord, The Master.
Ok, I did some editing. Much better if you ask me. Now on to part two before it gets edit again by me, then clocket then it will be posted on teaspoon *shudders*
